1 00:45:35,099 --> 00:45:38,303 [ Applause ] 2 00:45:40,900 --> 00:45:45,471 That... was... terrible. 3 00:45:45,566 --> 00:45:47,968 You brought nothing new to this competition. 4 00:45:48,066 --> 00:45:49,734 l'm just -- l've seen this so many times. 5 00:45:49,833 --> 00:45:52,001 l just don't think your heart was in it. 6 00:45:52,099 --> 00:45:54,101 l don't know. l thought it was kind of classic. 7 00:45:54,199 --> 00:45:55,367 An oldie but a goody. 8 00:45:55,466 --> 00:45:57,534 Well, there's a surprise. Nancy likes it. 9 00:45:57,633 --> 00:45:59,901 Oh, here we go. Here we go. 10 00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:02,635 l'm afraid you're not going to Hollywood. 11 00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:05,035 [ Applause ] 12 00:46:15,433 --> 00:46:16,767 What's your name, dude? 13 00:46:16,933 --> 00:46:19,535 Carl Feindleman. 14 00:46:38,566 --> 00:46:43,504 Those pants look horrible. 15 00:46:43,599 --> 00:46:44,801 What's with the pants, dawg? 16 00:46:44,966 --> 00:46:46,534 Oh, come on, guys. Stop it. 17 00:46:46,633 --> 00:46:48,267 You look ridiculous right now. 18 00:46:48,433 --> 00:46:50,535 Next please. 19 00:46:50,800 --> 00:46:52,902 [ Applause ] 20 00:46:58,900 --> 00:47:00,768 [ Screams ] 21 00:47:12,233 --> 00:47:13,801 Hey, guys. 22 00:47:16,966 --> 00:47:19,802 [ Applause ] 23 00:47:19,900 --> 00:47:22,102 Okay. That was different. 24 00:47:22,199 --> 00:47:23,334 That was new. 25 00:47:23,433 --> 00:47:24,333 Not bad. 26 00:47:24,433 --> 00:47:28,270 Well, l'm not completely convinced that that was a suicide. 27 00:47:28,366 --> 00:47:31,569 lt looked like it might have been an accident. 28 00:47:31,733 --> 00:47:35,436 Excuse me, did you mean to kill yourself that way? 29 00:47:35,533 --> 00:47:37,468 Yeah. 30 00:47:37,633 --> 00:47:40,502 Why is there a noose hanging out of your pocket? 31 00:47:40,599 --> 00:47:42,535 You clowning us, dawg? 32 00:47:42,633 --> 00:47:44,568 Next. 33 00:47:50,433 --> 00:47:52,268 Hi, l'm Chyanne. 34 00:47:52,433 --> 00:47:53,634 Hi, Chyanne. 35 00:47:53,800 --> 00:47:57,103 l'm gonna be singing, ''She'll Be Coming 'Round The Mountain'' 36 00:47:57,199 --> 00:47:59,802 by Dolly Parton. 37 00:48:03,733 --> 00:48:15,010 # She'll be coming 'round the mountain when she comes # 38 00:48:15,099 --> 00:48:25,109 # She'll be coming 'round the mountain when she comes # 39 00:48:25,199 --> 00:48:29,604 # She'll be coming 'round the mountain # 40 00:48:29,699 --> 00:48:35,305 # She'll be coming 'round the mountain # 41 00:48:35,400 --> 00:48:47,245 # She'll be coming round the mountain when she comes # 42 00:48:49,266 --> 00:48:53,336 Chyanne, l don't think you're on the right show. 43 00:48:53,800 --> 00:48:55,001 What do you mean? 44 00:48:55,099 --> 00:48:56,201 This ain't a talent show, baby. 45 00:48:56,366 --> 00:48:57,533 lt's not? 46 00:48:57,633 --> 00:48:59,167 No, l'm sorry. 47 00:48:59,333 --> 00:49:01,334 Oh, my God. l'm so embarrassed. 48 00:49:01,433 --> 00:49:03,101 Oh, it's okay, honey. 49 00:49:03,199 --> 00:49:08,104 l've made a fool of myself. l'm so depressed. 50 00:49:08,199 --> 00:49:12,337 l don't know what l'm gonna do. 51 00:49:15,099 --> 00:49:16,501 That's what l'm talkin' about! 52 00:49:16,599 --> 00:49:19,069 That's what l'm talkin' about! 53 00:49:19,166 --> 00:49:22,969 Wow. Just wow. 54 00:49:23,099 --> 00:49:25,001 l'm confused. Was she on the wrong show? 55 00:49:25,099 --> 00:49:27,969 Chyanne, you're going to Hollywood. 56 00:49:28,066 --> 00:49:32,637 That is exactly what this show is all about. Refreshing. 57 00:49:32,800 --> 00:49:33,767 You go, girl. 58 00:49:36,166 --> 00:49:38,067 Have fun in Hollywood. 59 00:49:40,233 --> 00:49:41,601 Yeah! 60 00:49:43,500 --> 00:49:45,201 The revolution is complete! 61 00:49:45,300 --> 00:49:48,269 We have burned this capitalist system to the ground! 62 00:49:48,366 --> 00:49:49,967 Anarchy! 63 00:49:50,099 --> 00:49:50,867 Anarchy! 64 00:49:50,966 --> 00:49:53,101 We will no longer be held down 65 00:49:53,199 --> 00:49:56,336 by the technology that has enslaved us! 66 00:49:56,433 --> 00:49:58,168 Anarchy! 67 00:49:58,266 --> 00:50:00,568 No more laws! No more rules! 68 00:50:00,666 --> 00:50:03,702 We can live off the land like mankind was always meant to! 69 00:50:03,800 --> 00:50:09,372 We can go see movies for free now! Anarchy! 70 00:50:10,733 --> 00:50:13,435 Anarchy! 71 00:50:13,533 --> 00:50:15,101 Excuse me. Excuse me, hi. 72 00:50:15,199 --> 00:50:16,467 Barry Windsor. 73 00:50:16,566 --> 00:50:17,600 Just one quick thing. 74 00:50:17,699 --> 00:50:20,602 See, l used to work at the nuclear power plant up near by the airport. 75 00:50:20,699 --> 00:50:22,468 And, you know, not to be a downer or anything, 76 00:50:22,566 --> 00:50:25,435 but we're gonna have to keep a pretty close eye on that thing, 77 00:50:25,533 --> 00:50:27,468 so there's that. 78 00:50:27,566 --> 00:50:30,702 We don't need nuclear energy anymore! Anarchy! 79 00:50:30,800 --> 00:50:31,600 Anarchy! 80 00:50:31,699 --> 00:50:33,068 No, no, no, no. l'm all for that. 81 00:50:33,166 --> 00:50:35,268 Hey, revolution and all. l mean, that's great. 82 00:50:35,366 --> 00:50:36,633 But, uh, the thing is, 83 00:50:36,733 --> 00:50:39,969 if we don't keep cool water running over the spent plutonium rods, 84 00:50:40,066 --> 00:50:44,069 there's gonna be a meltdown, and that'll pretty much... end life. 85 00:50:44,166 --> 00:50:47,269 Okay, well, how often do we have to do that? 86 00:50:47,366 --> 00:50:52,137 Oh, l'd say about 3-4 times a day over the next 25 years. 87 00:50:52,233 --> 00:50:53,033 What? 88 00:50:53,133 --> 00:50:55,535 Okay, all right, so we'll just work together on this, 89 00:50:55,633 --> 00:50:58,869 and we'll take turns pouring water on the plutonium rods. 90 00:50:58,966 --> 00:51:00,267 Nooooo! 91 00:51:00,366 --> 00:51:03,802 No work! Free movies! 92 00:51:03,900 --> 00:51:06,902 Well, l mean, no one knows how to work the power plant, 93 00:51:07,066 --> 00:51:08,066 and he does. 94 00:51:08,166 --> 00:51:10,234 l'd just be afraid to screw something up 95 00:51:10,333 --> 00:51:11,567 with all the computers and all. 96 00:51:11,666 --> 00:51:13,567 l'm sure there's a password or something. 97 00:51:13,666 --> 00:51:15,300 Well, the password is just ''welcome.'' 98 00:51:15,400 --> 00:51:16,400 Make him do it! 99 00:51:16,533 --> 00:51:17,867 Yeah! Make him do it! 100 00:51:17,966 --> 00:51:19,167 Okay, all right. 101 00:51:19,333 --> 00:51:21,835 Well, since you have the most experience with this sort of thing, 102 00:51:21,933 --> 00:51:24,201 would you mind just taking one for the team 103 00:51:24,300 --> 00:51:26,502 and kind of staying on top of that? 104 00:51:26,599 --> 00:51:28,368 -Yeah! -Yeah! 105 00:51:28,466 --> 00:51:30,701 No, no, no, l'll do it. l mean, l don't mind. 106 00:51:30,800 --> 00:51:32,501 But it doesn't really seem fair. 107 00:51:32,599 --> 00:51:35,169 l mean, if l'm gonna be spending all my time up at the reactor, 108 00:51:35,266 --> 00:51:37,167 then how am l gonna scavenge and farm the land 109 00:51:37,266 --> 00:51:39,267 to provide food for my family? 110 00:51:39,366 --> 00:51:40,533 Okay, all right. 111 00:51:40,633 --> 00:51:43,802 l'm sure we can all agree that it's not a big deal to chip in, 112 00:51:43,900 --> 00:51:45,101 give him a little bit of our food 113 00:51:45,199 --> 00:51:48,536 in return for him saving our lives at the reactor plant. 114 00:51:48,699 --> 00:51:49,834 l guess. 115 00:51:49,933 --> 00:51:51,301 Well, thank you, guys. Thanks. 116 00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:54,636 That's really big of you, but the other thing is, 117 00:51:54,800 --> 00:51:57,235 is that it's not a one-man job, okay? 118 00:51:57,333 --> 00:51:59,301 l'm gonna need a team of people, all right? 119 00:51:59,400 --> 00:52:01,668 l can ask my guys, and l'm sure they'll do it, 120 00:52:01,766 --> 00:52:04,101 but they're gonna need some food, too. 121 00:52:04,199 --> 00:52:04,900 Ugh! 122 00:52:05,000 --> 00:52:07,168 Okay, so, if you see his team, 123 00:52:07,266 --> 00:52:09,334 help them out, give them a little food, too. 124 00:52:09,433 --> 00:52:10,433 l think that's only fair. 125 00:52:10,533 --> 00:52:13,335 Well, how will we know who's on his team and who's not? 126 00:52:13,433 --> 00:52:15,001 l mean, anyone could just come up and say, 127 00:52:15,099 --> 00:52:17,368 ''Hey, l work with dick-nose up at the power plant. 128 00:52:17,466 --> 00:52:18,767 Give me a food.'' 129 00:52:18,866 --> 00:52:19,633 Hey! 130 00:52:19,733 --> 00:52:21,468 Okay, here's what we'll do. Here's what we'll do. 131 00:52:21,566 --> 00:52:23,834 We'll make some shirts for him and his team that say, 132 00:52:23,933 --> 00:52:27,036 ''l work at the nuclear power plant, please give me some of your food.'' 133 00:52:27,133 --> 00:52:29,568 So, if you see somebody wearing a shirt that says that, 134 00:52:29,666 --> 00:52:30,867 be a nice guy -- 135 00:52:30,966 --> 00:52:32,367 Who's gonna make the shirts? 136 00:52:32,466 --> 00:52:33,700 l don't know who's gonna make the shirts. 137 00:52:33,800 --> 00:52:35,268 Rodney, will you make the shirts? 138 00:52:35,366 --> 00:52:38,402 Sorry, but l'm probably gonna be at the movie theatres 139 00:52:38,500 --> 00:52:39,901 most of the time! 140 00:52:40,000 --> 00:52:41,634 Darryl, will you make the shirts? 141 00:52:41,733 --> 00:52:42,767 -Fine. -Okay. 142 00:52:42,900 --> 00:52:44,201 But l'm gonna need some food, too. 143 00:52:44,300 --> 00:52:46,902 Okay, fine. Then just make yourself a shirt that says, 144 00:52:47,000 --> 00:52:49,102 ''l made this shirt. Please give me some of your food.'' 145 00:52:49,199 --> 00:52:50,768 And then everyone will give you some food. 146 00:52:50,900 --> 00:52:53,302 Well, what's to stop anyone from just making a shirt that says, 147 00:52:53,400 --> 00:52:56,035 ''Hey l do something stupid, feed my ass for it!'' 148 00:52:56,133 --> 00:52:58,101 Okay, l will be a shirt inspector, 149 00:52:58,199 --> 00:53:00,835 and l'll go around, and l'll make sure everybody's shirts are legit. 150 00:53:00,933 --> 00:53:01,733 ls that okay? 151 00:53:01,833 --> 00:53:04,335 So, will you make me a shirt that says ''Shirt Inspector '' please? 152 00:53:04,433 --> 00:53:05,801 That guy sounds like a cop! 153 00:53:05,900 --> 00:53:07,901 No, l'm not a cop! l'm just an inspector! 154 00:53:08,000 --> 00:53:10,369 He's a cop! Let's get him! 155 00:53:12,433 --> 00:53:14,301 A new age is upon us! 156 00:53:14,400 --> 00:53:16,902 We won't let the man hijack our revolution! 157 00:53:17,000 --> 00:53:18,801 Forget everything that guy said! 158 00:53:18,900 --> 00:53:20,534 Yeah! 159 00:53:20,633 --> 00:53:22,401 Forget everything that guy said? 160 00:53:22,500 --> 00:53:24,435 Yeah! 161 00:53:24,533 --> 00:53:27,068 Okay, okay. Well, uh, my name's Barry. 162 00:53:27,166 --> 00:53:30,002 And l used to work at a nuclear power plant up north. 163 00:53:32,966 --> 00:53:33,966 All right, gentlemen, 164 00:53:33,900 --> 00:53:36,168 let's start this meeting about the new direction of RC Cola. 165 00:53:36,266 --> 00:53:38,768 The presentation begins... 166 00:53:38,866 --> 00:53:39,633 .. .nOW. 167 00:53:39,800 --> 00:53:41,401 Got some ideas. 168 00:53:41,533 --> 00:53:43,801 By some l mean one big idea. 169 00:53:43,900 --> 00:53:46,702 RC Glow. That's right. 170 00:53:46,800 --> 00:53:49,769 The RC will glow. 171 00:53:51,033 --> 00:53:52,634 What do you mean ''glow''? 172 00:53:52,800 --> 00:53:55,602 The RC Cola is gonna glow. 173 00:53:55,766 --> 00:53:57,033 ln the dark? 174 00:53:57,166 --> 00:53:58,066 All the time. 175 00:53:58,233 --> 00:53:59,567 How are you gonna make the RC glow? 176 00:53:59,666 --> 00:54:01,601 That's for the marketing department to figure out. 177 00:54:01,766 --> 00:54:02,700 No, it's not. 178 00:54:02,866 --> 00:54:03,967 Yes, it is. 179 00:54:04,066 --> 00:54:04,900 Pete, do you have the sheet 180 00:54:05,000 --> 00:54:06,801 on what the different departments are and what they do? 181 00:54:10,766 --> 00:54:13,535 -That's not the marketing department. -You're the marketing department. 182 00:54:13,699 --> 00:54:17,070 l'm the marketing department. And l'm marketing RC Glow. 183 00:54:17,233 --> 00:54:18,267 -No, you're not. -Yes, l am. 184 00:54:18,433 --> 00:54:19,867 -No, you're not. -Yes, l am. 185 00:54:20,000 --> 00:54:21,234 -You're not. -Am. 186 00:54:21,400 --> 00:54:22,601 -Not. -RC Glow. 187 00:54:22,699 --> 00:54:24,234 How are you gonna make RC glow? 188 00:54:24,333 --> 00:54:25,701 That's for finance to figure out. 189 00:54:25,866 --> 00:54:27,667 -No, it's not. -Yes, it is. 190 00:54:27,800 --> 00:54:28,767 Look at the sheet. 191 00:54:28,900 --> 00:54:29,533 lt's not. 192 00:54:29,699 --> 00:54:30,434 lt's not. 193 00:54:30,533 --> 00:54:31,800 lt's not. That's marketing. 194 00:54:31,966 --> 00:54:33,334 No, you're marketing. 195 00:54:33,433 --> 00:54:34,133 l am. 196 00:54:34,266 --> 00:54:36,768 RC Glow. In stores soon. 197 00:54:36,900 --> 00:54:37,900 -No. -Yes. 198 00:54:38,000 --> 00:54:40,502 Why would a consumer choose an incandescent beverage? 199 00:54:40,633 --> 00:54:42,701 RC Cola, the incandescent beverage. 200 00:54:42,866 --> 00:54:44,534 You know any chemical that is going to make RC glow 201 00:54:44,633 --> 00:54:45,700 is going to be toxic. 202 00:54:45,866 --> 00:54:47,234 That's for finance to figure out. 203 00:54:47,333 --> 00:54:48,767 -No, it's not. -Look at the sheet. 204 00:54:48,900 --> 00:54:50,801 -Well, it's not for marketing. -Well, you're right. 205 00:54:50,966 --> 00:54:52,834 -So, we don't have to worry about it. -That's not true. 206 00:54:52,933 --> 00:54:55,135 RC Glow. Also vanilla RC Glow. 207 00:54:55,266 --> 00:54:55,966 -No. -Yes. 208 00:54:56,066 --> 00:54:56,900 -No. -Totally. 209 00:54:57,066 --> 00:54:58,133 -No. -Done deal. 210 00:54:58,266 --> 00:54:59,066 -lt's not. -lt is. 211 00:54:59,233 --> 00:55:00,334 -No. -Advertising. 212 00:55:00,500 --> 00:55:01,334 -Nope. -Finance. 213 00:55:01,500 --> 00:55:02,133 No. 214 00:55:02,266 --> 00:55:04,001 RC Glow. 215 00:55:06,133 --> 00:55:08,301 RC Glow. 216 00:55:09,766 --> 00:55:11,667 -Fine. -Thank you. 217 00:55:14,833 --> 00:55:19,103 Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, l call now a witness to the murder 218 00:55:18,800 --> 00:55:20,701 that took place at the Dancy Clam Strip Club 219 00:55:20,800 --> 00:55:22,635 on August 1 4. 220 00:55:22,733 --> 00:55:26,403 Miss Sugar Ponyberry, will you please take the stand? 221 00:55:39,966 --> 00:55:43,636 Miss Ponyberry, you are a stripper at the Dancy Clam, are you not? 222 00:55:43,800 --> 00:55:45,334 l'm an exotic dancer. 223 00:55:45,500 --> 00:55:48,169 And you witnessed the accused shoot Mr. Whitehall? 224 00:55:48,266 --> 00:55:49,867 Objection, Your Honor. Leading the witness. 225 00:55:50,033 --> 00:55:51,067 Sustained. 226 00:55:51,833 --> 00:55:55,436 Ms. Ponyberry, you were at the club the night of the shooting, correct? 227 00:55:55,533 --> 00:55:56,967 Yes, l was. 228 00:55:57,133 --> 00:55:58,767 And what were you doing? 229 00:55:58,933 --> 00:56:03,137 l was dancing on stage just a couple feet away from him. 230 00:56:03,266 --> 00:56:04,667 And what did you see? 231 00:56:04,800 --> 00:56:08,270 That man walked up and shot Mr. Whitehall 232 00:56:08,433 --> 00:56:09,901 and he fell into me. 233 00:56:11,900 --> 00:56:14,135 No further questions, Your Honor. 234 00:56:18,900 --> 00:56:23,237 Miss Ponyberry, if you were dancing when the shooting occurred, 235 00:56:23,333 --> 00:56:26,969 you couldn't possibly have gotten a good look at who the shooter was. 236 00:56:27,133 --> 00:56:29,168 No, but l did, 'cause l turned and looked. 237 00:56:29,266 --> 00:56:31,768 Could you show us the position? 238 00:56:31,900 --> 00:56:32,500 The what? 239 00:56:32,599 --> 00:56:35,235 Could you step up and show the jury the position you were in 240 00:56:35,333 --> 00:56:37,068 when the shooting occurred? 241 00:56:49,433 --> 00:56:50,367 Objection! 242 00:56:51,800 --> 00:56:52,867 Really? 243 00:56:58,066 --> 00:57:02,770 l mean, objection! Because she'd still be able to easily see the murderer 244 00:57:02,866 --> 00:57:07,503 because she didn't have all those clothes blocking her view! 245 00:57:07,666 --> 00:57:09,868 l call bullshit! Let's see it! 246 00:57:10,033 --> 00:57:14,971 Really? Are you serious, Your Honor? 247 00:57:15,066 --> 00:57:16,534 Um.... 248 00:57:16,633 --> 00:57:19,836 Yeah. Off with it. 249 00:57:35,066 --> 00:57:36,801 So, how'd that position go again? 250 00:57:36,966 --> 00:57:38,133 Yeah, how did that go? 251 00:57:38,300 --> 00:57:39,901 Well, it was kinda like this. 252 00:57:41,099 --> 00:57:43,669 Oh, God. It's so hard to do without a pole. 253 00:57:43,833 --> 00:57:46,268 -Can we get a pole in here? -Can we get a pole? 254 00:57:46,433 --> 00:57:48,601 Your Honor, we don't have a pole. 255 00:57:48,766 --> 00:57:51,602 Use the American flag! 256 00:58:04,300 --> 00:58:06,702 Well, l was kind of like this. 257 00:58:11,333 --> 00:58:16,271 And then l turned around, and he fell right into me. 258 00:58:16,433 --> 00:58:18,668 Um, may l? 259 00:58:21,400 --> 00:58:27,339 When the man fell into you, was it sort of like...? 260 00:58:32,033 --> 00:58:33,734 No, not really. 261 00:58:33,833 --> 00:58:35,901 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 262 00:58:36,066 --> 00:58:41,438 So, uh, this guy, when he fell into you, he was more like.... 263 00:58:46,633 --> 00:58:48,301 Like a roll, like that? 264 00:58:48,400 --> 00:58:50,502 Yeah, kind of, l guess. 265 00:58:50,599 --> 00:58:52,935 [ Judge clears throat ] 266 00:58:53,033 --> 00:58:58,872 Um, would the prosecution and the defense 267 00:58:58,966 --> 00:59:02,569 please approach the bench? 268 00:59:07,533 --> 00:59:16,008 See if you can get her to, you know.... 269 00:59:17,766 --> 00:59:24,072 See if you can get her to, like, kiss a girl. 270 00:59:26,733 --> 00:59:30,436 We don't have any other girls, Sir. 271 00:59:33,933 --> 00:59:41,206 Um, what about, like, one of the jurors? 272 00:59:41,566 --> 00:59:43,301 We probably shouldn't do that, Sir. 273 00:59:43,400 --> 00:59:45,869 We shouldn't do that. 274 00:59:45,966 --> 00:59:47,467 All right. 275 00:59:49,233 --> 00:59:51,101 [ Clears throat ] 276 01:00:00,133 --> 01:00:02,368 See if she'll like.... 277 01:00:02,466 --> 01:00:05,302 Be like, ''Hey '' um.... 278 01:00:05,400 --> 01:00:09,003 Would you, like.... 279 01:00:11,833 --> 01:00:15,636 [ Whispering indistinctly ] 280 01:00:16,566 --> 01:00:20,369 Um, we're doing something! 281 01:00:21,866 --> 01:00:25,436 Doesn't anybody knock? 282 01:00:29,366 --> 01:00:30,834 There you go. 283 01:00:30,933 --> 01:00:34,069 Daddy, tell me that story again. 284 01:00:34,166 --> 01:00:36,167 Okay. 285 01:00:36,833 --> 01:00:39,735 Well, once upon a time 286 01:00:39,833 --> 01:00:42,635 when your daddy was really, really young, 287 01:00:42,733 --> 01:00:46,670 he met the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. 288 01:00:46,833 --> 01:00:52,538 She had long, gorgeous hair and the prettiest smile. 289 01:00:53,633 --> 01:00:57,737 And he also met the woman's drunk, loud friend. 290 01:00:57,833 --> 01:01:01,403 And see, the beautiful woman had this asshole boyfriend 291 01:01:01,500 --> 01:01:04,135 who everyone thought was cool because he was a dick. 292 01:01:04,300 --> 01:01:06,969 So what would happen was, was whenever your daddy 293 01:01:07,066 --> 01:01:09,668 was trying to hang out with the beautiful maiden, 294 01:01:09,766 --> 01:01:13,302 he would end up going home with the loud alchy. 295 01:01:13,400 --> 01:01:15,935 And you see, when someone's locked in 296 01:01:16,033 --> 01:01:18,602 to a serious substance-abuse problem, 297 01:01:18,699 --> 01:01:21,903 they let the little things in their life fall by the wayside, 298 01:01:22,000 --> 01:01:24,535 like remembering to take their pills. 299 01:01:24,633 --> 01:01:26,234 And that's when you came along. 300 01:01:26,333 --> 01:01:27,600 l'm in this story? 301 01:01:27,699 --> 01:01:31,036 You're a big part of this story, 'cause when you showed up, 302 01:01:31,133 --> 01:01:32,968 your daddy had to sell his muscle car 303 01:01:33,066 --> 01:01:35,101 to make an honest woman out of that skank. 304 01:01:35,266 --> 01:01:39,436 The reality is, selling all the muscle cars in the world 305 01:01:39,533 --> 01:01:42,302 wouldn't make that strumpet an honest woman. 306 01:01:42,866 --> 01:01:46,102 Some people are just bad. 307 01:01:46,199 --> 01:01:48,835 They're just born bad. 308 01:01:49,000 --> 01:01:52,436 Daddy, do you think Mommy will ever find us again? 309 01:01:52,599 --> 01:01:56,036 l got a thirty-aught-six that says it doesn't matter if she does. 310 01:01:56,199 --> 01:01:57,634 l love you, Dad. 311 01:01:57,800 --> 01:02:01,103 We leave this world together. Do you understand me? 312 01:02:01,199 --> 01:02:03,802 We leave this world together. 313 01:02:03,900 --> 01:02:04,867 l know. 314 01:02:04,966 --> 01:02:06,367 Ho, ho, ho! 315 01:02:06,466 --> 01:02:07,333 lt's Santa! 316 01:02:07,433 --> 01:02:08,867 Grab the cookies! 317 01:02:10,433 --> 01:02:11,634 [ Gasps ] 318 01:02:13,233 --> 01:02:17,103 Ho, ho! l brought peas! 319 01:02:17,266 --> 01:02:18,467 Ugh, lame. 320 01:02:18,566 --> 01:02:19,700 Yeah. 321 01:02:19,833 --> 01:02:26,139 No, no, no, no, no. l mean l brought world peace! 322 01:02:26,300 --> 01:02:28,168 Oh, that's cool. 323 01:02:28,333 --> 01:02:33,304 l'm just kidding. l meant a sack of pee! 324 01:02:34,266 --> 01:02:37,202 Ugh. Worst Christmas ever. 325 01:02:37,300 --> 01:02:38,768 Come on. 326 01:02:38,866 --> 01:02:42,569 What? Do you get it? 327 01:02:55,966 --> 01:02:57,667 Mommy, what is that? 328 01:02:57,766 --> 01:03:00,034 l think it's a helicopter. 329 01:03:00,133 --> 01:03:02,468 That's too big to be a helicopter. 330 01:03:23,733 --> 01:03:26,969 Greetings. Welcome to our planet. 331 01:03:31,099 --> 01:03:33,869 -Duh. -Duh, duh, duh. 332 01:03:36,866 --> 01:03:39,935 Oh! Honey, stand back. 333 01:03:42,000 --> 01:03:44,802 We don't understand your language! 334 01:03:44,900 --> 01:03:47,102 You should go to Washington! 335 01:03:47,266 --> 01:03:48,834 Washington D.C. is that way! 336 01:03:48,933 --> 01:03:50,601 Go to Washington! 337 01:03:50,766 --> 01:03:54,569 ''Go to Washington.'' ''Go to Washington.'' 338 01:03:54,733 --> 01:03:56,234 ''Go to Washington.'' 339 01:03:56,400 --> 01:03:58,835 Oh, sweet Jesus! 340 01:03:59,000 --> 01:04:01,168 ''lt's that way!'' ''Washington is that way!'' 341 01:04:01,766 --> 01:04:03,434 Well, what do you want? 342 01:04:06,033 --> 01:04:07,868 [ Laughing ] 343 01:04:22,233 --> 01:04:24,234 Those pricks!