1 00:00:02,936 --> 00:00:05,837 - Dennis, stop acting like a child. - I don't want to hear it, Dad. 2 00:00:05,905 --> 00:00:09,170 Deandra, move the pool table so you and your brother can lay some grout. 3 00:00:09,242 --> 00:00:11,369 I am not laying grout. 4 00:00:11,444 --> 00:00:13,378 - You guys are being babies. - Babies. 5 00:00:13,446 --> 00:00:15,710 We're being babies, Mac? Why don't you go work for your dad all day? 6 00:00:15,782 --> 00:00:18,842 - My dad's a meth dealer. - Oh, oh, no! 7 00:00:18,918 --> 00:00:22,911 - My daddy's in prison! - My daddy used to give hot shots to prostitutes. 8 00:00:22,989 --> 00:00:25,981 - Feel sorry for me! - I got the grout. 9 00:00:26,059 --> 00:00:28,118 - Dad, you're not even listening to us. - Are you really leaving? 10 00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:30,219 - Yes! - Later, bitches. 11 00:00:30,296 --> 00:00:32,730 - Yeah, have a good life now. - All right, look. 12 00:00:32,799 --> 00:00:37,099 I know what you're doin'. I can play this game. Mac and me and Charlie can run the bar. 13 00:00:37,170 --> 00:00:39,161 - Great. Terrific. Good idea. - Great. We got better things to do. 14 00:00:39,239 --> 00:00:41,002 Please. What are you two gonna do? 15 00:00:41,074 --> 00:00:43,634 Dee and I have a little something we like to call "goals." 16 00:00:43,710 --> 00:00:46,042 - Weird, right? - We have aspirations outside of this bar. 17 00:00:46,112 --> 00:00:48,910 We got big dreams, Mac. We're gonna go follow 'em. 18 00:00:48,982 --> 00:00:50,973 You guys have nothing without this bar. 19 00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:53,781 Don't worry about us, Mac. We'll be just fine. 20 00:01:25,751 --> 00:01:28,345 - So what are your dreams? - Hmm? 21 00:01:28,421 --> 00:01:32,152 - Your goals. What are your aspirations? - Were you serious about that? 22 00:01:32,224 --> 00:01:34,215 Yeah! What are you doing? 23 00:01:34,293 --> 00:01:36,659 - Signing us up for unemployment benefits. - Unemployment? No. 24 00:01:36,729 --> 00:01:40,221 Dee, that's for deadbeats. Come on. We got a golden opportunity here. 25 00:01:40,299 --> 00:01:43,291 You know? We can do anything we want if we put our minds to it. 26 00:01:43,369 --> 00:01:47,305 Well, I guess I could use this time to get my acting career off the ground. 27 00:01:47,373 --> 00:01:49,364 - And I fully support you. - You do? 28 00:01:49,442 --> 00:01:54,004 Absolute... The old Dennis would have said, "Dee, your sad little acting ship sailed a decade ago. 29 00:01:54,080 --> 00:01:58,813 It's pathetic." But the new Dennis says that it's not my place to kill your pipe dreams. 30 00:01:58,884 --> 00:02:00,875 - You should go for it. - Really? 31 00:02:00,953 --> 00:02:04,548 Yes! Come on. This is America! We're gonna go for it! We're gonna work hard! 32 00:02:04,623 --> 00:02:07,922 We're gonna reach for the stars! We're gonna become more successful than our parents. 33 00:02:07,993 --> 00:02:10,223 - We can shove it in their faces. - Make 'em eat shit! 34 00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:12,730 Oh, look, we qualified. 35 00:02:12,798 --> 00:02:15,494 - Really? How much? - 400 a week. 36 00:02:15,568 --> 00:02:18,537 - 400... That's more than we made at the bar. - I know. 37 00:02:20,973 --> 00:02:23,066 Okay, new plan. 38 00:02:23,142 --> 00:02:25,133 - We're gonna go on unemployment. - Yeah. 39 00:02:25,211 --> 00:02:27,441 - That's what it's there for, right? - In the meantime... 40 00:02:27,513 --> 00:02:32,382 we will focus and work hard and keep our nose to the grindstone. 41 00:02:32,451 --> 00:02:34,385 Right? 42 00:02:34,453 --> 00:02:36,387 Absolutely. 43 00:02:39,058 --> 00:02:41,049 - Ready? - Yeah. 44 00:02:41,127 --> 00:02:44,028 One, two, three. 45 00:02:47,466 --> 00:02:50,731 - Goddamn it! - Wha... Why can you not lift your end? 46 00:02:50,803 --> 00:02:54,068 - I don't know, dude. Let me figure out what is happening. - Are you lifting with your back? 47 00:02:54,140 --> 00:02:56,700 Of course I'm lifting with my back. I think your end is lighter. 48 00:02:56,776 --> 00:02:58,767 The balls have rolled down to this end. 49 00:02:58,844 --> 00:03:00,869 No! You got to snap your back up and lift. 50 00:03:00,946 --> 00:03:04,279 - I'm jerking my back up! What do you want from me? - Hey, what's the ruckus? 51 00:03:04,350 --> 00:03:06,648 I'm trying to conduct important business back there. 52 00:03:06,719 --> 00:03:09,745 We finished with the tile. Now we're trying to move the pool table back. 53 00:03:09,822 --> 00:03:12,791 All right, all right, all right. Have you done the urinal? 54 00:03:12,858 --> 00:03:16,419 Because the urinal, you flush it, and it sprays all over the place. 55 00:03:16,495 --> 00:03:19,225 - Yeah, I know. - Look, bro. You gotta stop bossing us around, okay? 56 00:03:19,298 --> 00:03:21,232 I mean, look at Charlie. You're breaking his spirit. 57 00:03:21,300 --> 00:03:23,825 Look at me. I'm broken, dude. Look, I'm... 58 00:03:23,903 --> 00:03:26,736 You guys need a father figure. And I'm trying to be that father figure... 59 00:03:26,806 --> 00:03:28,797 and someday you're gonna thank me for it. 60 00:03:28,874 --> 00:03:32,401 And that's all there is to it. Trust me. Trust me on that one. 61 00:03:32,478 --> 00:03:34,946 You're gonna thank me for it. 62 00:03:36,749 --> 00:03:39,479 I don't want a father figure. 63 00:03:50,596 --> 00:03:53,394 Come down just a little bit. 64 00:03:53,465 --> 00:03:55,831 He's not hitting it that high, you know? 65 00:03:55,901 --> 00:03:58,369 Now you should split the difference. 66 00:03:58,437 --> 00:04:00,462 - You got to split the difference. - Yeah, split the difference. 67 00:04:00,539 --> 00:04:03,133 What the hell is this? 68 00:04:03,209 --> 00:04:06,701 Oh, living the dream, bro. Living the dream. 69 00:04:06,779 --> 00:04:08,974 I thought you two were out looking for careers or something. 70 00:04:09,048 --> 00:04:12,449 We are. We're just getting a little bit of assistance to help us out over the hump. 71 00:04:12,518 --> 00:04:16,045 And this unemployment thing is so great, because we've made really big plans. 72 00:04:16,121 --> 00:04:18,589 - I'm gonna be a veterinarian. - Yeah. 73 00:04:18,657 --> 00:04:21,956 - And I am gonna move to New York, and I'm gonna be on Broadway. - Mm-hmm. 74 00:04:22,027 --> 00:04:25,224 What? It's 1:00 in the afternoon, and you're piss-ass drunk. 75 00:04:25,297 --> 00:04:29,256 Well, it's a slow process, man. It takes a little time. But we trust the system. 76 00:04:29,335 --> 00:04:31,360 - Is that a new watch, dude? - It is. It's awesome. 77 00:04:31,437 --> 00:04:34,031 - And I got a Jesus chain. - It's good. Look at it. 78 00:04:34,106 --> 00:04:36,574 All right, look, guys. We want you to come back to the bar, okay? 79 00:04:36,642 --> 00:04:39,611 - Why in the hell would we do that? - You're not even listening to me. 80 00:04:39,678 --> 00:04:41,805 - Did you see myJesus chain? - I'm busting my ass in that bar... 81 00:04:41,881 --> 00:04:44,008 and you guys are sitting on the stoop getting drunk all day long? 82 00:04:44,083 --> 00:04:46,677 What, this again? What, this again? 83 00:04:46,752 --> 00:04:49,721 - I have to work! - Cry for me. Cry for me. 84 00:04:49,788 --> 00:04:52,382 I don't know how to take advantage of government programs. 85 00:04:52,458 --> 00:04:56,690 Unemployment runs out. And once it does, you guys are gonna be back out on your asses. 86 00:04:56,762 --> 00:04:59,856 - Once it runs out, we're gonna go on welfare, dude. - Yup. 87 00:04:59,932 --> 00:05:02,196 - Welfare? - Mm-hmm. 88 00:05:02,268 --> 00:05:05,260 - You guys can't go on welfare. - Oh, really? 89 00:05:05,337 --> 00:05:07,931 It's reserved for people who need it, you know? 90 00:05:08,007 --> 00:05:10,737 Like poor people who need some help thr... 91 00:05:10,809 --> 00:05:13,505 It's set up to continue... 92 00:05:13,579 --> 00:05:18,278 It's not for overprivileged pieces of shit who want to waste millions of dollars in tax... 93 00:05:18,350 --> 00:05:20,944 You want to play this game? We gonna play this game now? 94 00:05:22,388 --> 00:05:24,379 Goddamn you! 95 00:05:24,456 --> 00:05:26,947 Goddamn it! 96 00:05:29,662 --> 00:05:32,722 Charlie, sign here, here and here. 97 00:05:32,798 --> 00:05:37,258 So, you're giving me all your money. 98 00:05:37,336 --> 00:05:42,569 Charlie, for the 500th time, I'm not giving it to you. It's not yours. 99 00:05:42,641 --> 00:05:46,441 I'm just setting up a temporary account in your name. 100 00:05:46,512 --> 00:05:49,310 What my wife can't find, she can't get. 101 00:05:49,381 --> 00:05:53,784 Right. This is good. This is shady, Frank. I like this kind of stuff. 102 00:05:53,852 --> 00:05:57,117 But you will be handsomely rewarded if you just keep your hands off this money. 103 00:05:57,189 --> 00:05:59,851 Right, right. So what's the vig? 104 00:06:01,126 --> 00:06:03,856 - The vig? - Yeah, man. 105 00:06:03,929 --> 00:06:07,160 You know, what's... what's the vig on this action here? 106 00:06:07,232 --> 00:06:09,666 Do you even know what "vig" means? 107 00:06:10,769 --> 00:06:13,431 Hey-ohh! What's up, bitches? 108 00:06:13,505 --> 00:06:16,941 - Get your gloves. I got a lot of grout work for you to do. - Forget the grout. 109 00:06:17,009 --> 00:06:19,603 I have been doing a little research that will change our lives forever. 110 00:06:19,678 --> 00:06:23,114 Turns out there's a little program called Work for Welfare... 111 00:06:23,182 --> 00:06:26,948 in which businesses hire potential welfare recipients... 112 00:06:27,019 --> 00:06:29,783 the government subsidizes their wage... 113 00:06:29,855 --> 00:06:32,824 and the I.R.S. Affords thousands of dollars in tax relief. 114 00:06:34,259 --> 00:06:36,250 Oh, I don't know what you're saying. 115 00:06:36,328 --> 00:06:39,126 Dude, is that a question? I don't understand. What's going on? 116 00:06:39,198 --> 00:06:41,996 Don't you get it? We will never need Dennis and Dee again. 117 00:06:42,067 --> 00:06:47,471 We hire a couple people, pay them nothing, and get them to do all of our work for us! 118 00:06:47,539 --> 00:06:49,769 - We just pay them nothing? - We pay them nothing! 119 00:06:49,842 --> 00:06:51,867 - That's incredible. - It's incredible! 120 00:06:51,944 --> 00:06:55,710 - What do you think, Frank? - Well, if we're gonna do something like this... 121 00:06:55,781 --> 00:06:58,579 - we got to make sure we don't abuse anybody. - No. Oh, my God! 122 00:06:58,650 --> 00:07:02,142 I know what it's like to grow up poor. We got to treat people with respect. 123 00:07:02,221 --> 00:07:05,156 Respect is the name of the game. Respect is number one! 124 00:07:05,224 --> 00:07:07,317 - It's the name of almost every game. - Absolutely. 125 00:07:07,393 --> 00:07:11,159 - Because we understand the plight of the worker. - The plight! 126 00:07:11,230 --> 00:07:13,994 - Respect. - Respect the plight. 127 00:07:14,066 --> 00:07:16,626 What do you think, Frank? 128 00:07:17,636 --> 00:07:19,968 I'm good. Go get us some slaves. 129 00:07:26,278 --> 00:07:28,269 No, dude. That's not what I'm saying. 130 00:07:28,347 --> 00:07:31,578 - All I'm saying is that "slaves" is not a racist term. - Shh! 131 00:07:31,650 --> 00:07:34,881 Look, dude, I'm... Okay, look. I'm saying over the history of time, right? 132 00:07:34,953 --> 00:07:38,116 There have been slaves of many different races. There's been Jewish slaves. 133 00:07:38,190 --> 00:07:40,522 - I mean, uh, Italian, uh... - I recognize that, Charlie. 134 00:07:40,592 --> 00:07:43,618 But in this country, we have to understand that it is a sensitive issue, okay? 135 00:07:43,695 --> 00:07:46,994 - I understand that. - What about that one? He seems strong. 136 00:07:47,066 --> 00:07:49,398 - Look at those massive thighs. - Yeah, those are good thighs. 137 00:07:49,468 --> 00:07:52,699 - But you're gonna have a problem with work ethic. - That's what I'm talking about. 138 00:07:52,771 --> 00:07:54,864 - You can't be saying things like that. - No, dude. 139 00:07:54,940 --> 00:07:58,535 - I'm not saying that because he's black. He's asleep in his chair. - That's true. 140 00:07:58,610 --> 00:08:00,601 - What about that one? - Don't just do that. 141 00:08:00,679 --> 00:08:03,842 - Why not? - I knew you were gonna do that. Why are you going to him? 142 00:08:03,916 --> 00:08:07,079 That's like reverse affirmative action, dude. 143 00:08:07,152 --> 00:08:10,383 You don't want to do that. You could cheat yourself out of a good slave here. 144 00:08:10,456 --> 00:08:13,857 - Well, how do you know he's not gonna be a good slave? - Come on. 145 00:08:13,926 --> 00:08:17,020 You know what? This is so complicated and confusing. I don't even understand. 146 00:08:17,096 --> 00:08:21,055 - Let's look at this guy. - We got to talk to someone. Let's just talk to someone. 147 00:08:22,334 --> 00:08:24,859 Hello. Hi. 148 00:08:24,937 --> 00:08:27,371 We are here to sign up for the Work for Welfare Program. 149 00:08:27,439 --> 00:08:31,102 My associate and I were just out on the floor. We're looking for a suitable candidate. 150 00:08:31,176 --> 00:08:33,974 But the problem is it's really tough to tell just by eyeballing these people. 151 00:08:34,046 --> 00:08:36,981 - So we were wondering, like, do you have, like, a face book? - Yeah. 152 00:08:37,049 --> 00:08:40,143 Or anything that we can go over, like their physical stats and some kind of numbers... 153 00:08:40,219 --> 00:08:42,153 - Excuse me? - Like weight, power... 154 00:08:42,221 --> 00:08:45,952 - Something to just "expediate" the whole process. - It doesn't work that way. 155 00:08:46,024 --> 00:08:51,155 Why don't you read up on some of the program's stipulations? 156 00:08:51,230 --> 00:08:53,790 - Ooh, that's big. - The face book? 157 00:08:53,866 --> 00:08:57,495 No. Rules and Regulations. It's, uh, sort of a legal document. 158 00:08:57,569 --> 00:09:00,663 - Now, is there any way around this? - Ohh, you're right. 159 00:09:00,739 --> 00:09:02,900 - None whatsoever. - Okay. 160 00:09:02,975 --> 00:09:04,966 - All right, well... - Thank you for your time. 161 00:09:05,043 --> 00:09:07,477 - We got this, so we'll read it. - Have a good one. 162 00:09:07,546 --> 00:09:09,571 - I'm not reading that. - No, I'm not reading this either. 163 00:09:09,648 --> 00:09:12,276 - We'll get Frank to do it. - Maybe get a slave to do it. 164 00:09:12,351 --> 00:09:14,342 - Look what the cat dragged in. - Oh, come on. 165 00:09:14,419 --> 00:09:18,822 - Oh, well, look here. - I see you've decided to steal our welfare idea. 166 00:09:18,891 --> 00:09:22,088 - I can't say I'm surprised. - We're not stealing your idea, okay? 167 00:09:22,161 --> 00:09:24,629 Let's all recognize that this is a little awkward situation... 168 00:09:24,696 --> 00:09:26,687 between friends at the welfare store. 169 00:09:26,765 --> 00:09:29,290 - Let's go our separate ways, okay? - You guys can't get welfare! 170 00:09:29,368 --> 00:09:31,336 - Uh, yeah. We can. - No, you can't! 171 00:09:31,403 --> 00:09:33,394 They don't give it to any jackass that walks in here. 172 00:09:33,472 --> 00:09:35,463 - It's reserved for people who need it. - That's true. 173 00:09:35,541 --> 00:09:38,101 Drug addicts, mentally disabled, people with dependents... that sort of thing. 174 00:09:38,177 --> 00:09:41,704 Mac, we've got it covered, okay? Dee, your bicycle helmet. 175 00:09:45,083 --> 00:09:47,017 Later, boners. 176 00:09:47,085 --> 00:09:49,519 That is an awesome helmet. 177 00:09:49,588 --> 00:09:51,522 What... Go! Out! 178 00:09:51,590 --> 00:09:53,490 Hello. 179 00:09:53,559 --> 00:09:57,017 Hi. Um, I'm a recovering crackhead. 180 00:09:57,095 --> 00:09:59,529 This is my retarded sister that I take care of. 181 00:09:59,598 --> 00:10:01,862 I'd like some welfare, please. 182 00:10:01,934 --> 00:10:04,994 You're a recovering crack addict? 183 00:10:05,070 --> 00:10:07,561 - Yep. - Mm-hmm. 184 00:10:07,639 --> 00:10:11,405 And she's mentally retarded? 185 00:10:11,476 --> 00:10:13,501 Oh, most definitely. 186 00:10:13,579 --> 00:10:16,207 You have the proper medical paperwork? 187 00:10:16,281 --> 00:10:18,875 Medical paperwork? 188 00:10:18,951 --> 00:10:22,910 We're gonna need a physician's report to confirm your sister's mental illness... 189 00:10:22,988 --> 00:10:27,652 and your blood work to confirm your... crack addiction. 190 00:10:29,728 --> 00:10:33,721 Well, can't you see how retarded she is? 191 00:10:41,673 --> 00:10:44,801 - Lose the helmet, Sis. We can't prove that you're retarded. 192 00:10:44,876 --> 00:10:47,310 - I want that welfare, Dennis. - I know you do. So do I. 193 00:10:47,379 --> 00:10:50,405 No, you don't understand. I got a taste of my dream. I can't go back. 194 00:10:50,482 --> 00:10:53,713 - I got to get to Broadway, and welfare's the key. - What do you want to do? 195 00:10:53,785 --> 00:10:58,415 Oh, they want to play rough? We can play rough. Let's go buy some crack. 196 00:11:04,261 --> 00:11:07,128 Okay, thank you. We're all set. Friday, 3:00. Full blood work. 197 00:11:07,198 --> 00:11:09,223 - Okay. We'll just smoke a little bit. - A little bit. 198 00:11:09,300 --> 00:11:11,291 Just enough to get into our system. 199 00:11:11,368 --> 00:11:13,928 Then we'll go to the doctor, we'll get all of our paperwork, and we'll get full benefits. 200 00:11:14,004 --> 00:11:16,598 Then we'll collect for just a little while until we get settled. 201 00:11:16,674 --> 00:11:19,268 - Then I'll take the MCATs. - And I'll move to New York. Perfect. 202 00:11:19,343 --> 00:11:20,810 Oh, my God! 203 00:11:20,878 --> 00:11:23,039 - Oh, Jesus! - Ooh, wow, you scared us. 204 00:11:23,114 --> 00:11:26,641 - Oh, not 'cause you're black. No, we're not racist. - No. God, no. 205 00:11:26,717 --> 00:11:29,015 - It's just that the neighborhood is scary. - If you were another ethnicity... 206 00:11:29,086 --> 00:11:31,054 - You really did pop up. - But it's a nice neighborhood. 207 00:11:31,122 --> 00:11:33,113 - No, the trees are... - It's the nature of this... 208 00:11:33,190 --> 00:11:35,055 Roll your window down. 209 00:11:35,126 --> 00:11:37,060 Okay. 210 00:11:39,530 --> 00:11:42,465 - What you need? - Uh, one, please. 211 00:11:42,533 --> 00:11:44,558 One what? 212 00:11:44,635 --> 00:11:47,570 - Uh, one rock of crack. - One crack... 213 00:11:47,638 --> 00:11:50,573 A crack rock. Is that enough? Is one crack rock enough? 214 00:11:50,641 --> 00:11:53,872 - See, I don't... - How much would you recommend for a first-time user? 215 00:11:55,813 --> 00:11:58,805 Tell you what. I'll make you a deal. 216 00:11:58,883 --> 00:12:00,874 Two for the price of one. 217 00:12:00,951 --> 00:12:03,249 - Really? - Oh, that sounds good. 218 00:12:03,320 --> 00:12:05,811 - Oh. Well, that's very nice of you. - How much? 219 00:12:05,890 --> 00:12:08,723 Uh, $200? 220 00:12:10,895 --> 00:12:13,557 - Okay. Uh-huh. - Sounds reasonable. Great. 221 00:12:13,631 --> 00:12:15,724 Okay. Let's see here, uh... 222 00:12:17,835 --> 00:12:23,068 - That should be about 200. Thanks for being so kind. - Mm-hmm. 223 00:12:24,775 --> 00:12:26,868 And patient. 224 00:12:27,945 --> 00:12:29,913 Pick it up down there. 225 00:12:29,980 --> 00:12:33,780 - Wait. Where? - Wh-Which... 226 00:12:33,851 --> 00:12:35,876 This one. It's got to be that guy. 227 00:12:35,953 --> 00:12:37,944 Don't say "this one." 228 00:12:40,624 --> 00:12:43,684 Now, Maria, after you're done in the bathroom you come look for me... 229 00:12:43,761 --> 00:12:46,127 because I got some boots to be shined, all right? 230 00:12:46,197 --> 00:12:49,064 Tony, go chase that leak down in the basement, all right? 231 00:12:49,133 --> 00:12:52,500 - Okay, boss. - Okay. 232 00:12:52,570 --> 00:12:55,801 Mac, I got to hand it to you. This is brilliant. 233 00:12:55,873 --> 00:12:58,364 - That's how I roll. Charles? - Oh, yeah, yeah. 234 00:12:58,442 --> 00:13:01,900 I'm gonna get nice and drunk, play some video games until my eyes bleed. 235 00:13:01,979 --> 00:13:05,380 - Amen to that, brother. - Me too. I want to play Charlie. 236 00:13:07,184 --> 00:13:12,816 - Uhh, don't you have, like, some stuff that you need to do? - Yeah. Yeah. 237 00:13:12,890 --> 00:13:15,017 - No. - Yeah, managerial stuff. 238 00:13:15,092 --> 00:13:17,253 - Managerial stuff! - No, I got that all cleared up. 239 00:13:17,328 --> 00:13:20,092 - And then I thought after we played a video game... - Uh-huh. 240 00:13:20,164 --> 00:13:24,123 The three of us go outside, throw the pigskin around, play some two-hand touch. 241 00:13:24,201 --> 00:13:27,170 - Ooh, ooh. - Hey, that's not gonna... that's not gonna work out. 242 00:13:27,238 --> 00:13:30,071 - I'll teach you how to play. - I already know how to play. 243 00:13:30,140 --> 00:13:32,267 Not properly though. 244 00:13:32,343 --> 00:13:34,675 - Kind of properly. - Right. Uh, oh, Charlie. 245 00:13:34,745 --> 00:13:37,680 You know what? We got to get into the bathroom to show Maria... 246 00:13:37,748 --> 00:13:39,739 - The mixing! - Charlie has this thing... the scrubbing. 247 00:13:39,817 --> 00:13:42,445 - Scrubbing! - Charlie has this scrubbing thing with the Brillo. 248 00:13:42,519 --> 00:13:45,147 - I have a Brillo. - He has a method, and we gotta show her. 249 00:13:45,222 --> 00:13:48,123 - And make sure she's got it down. - All right. I'll get myself a beer. 250 00:13:48,192 --> 00:13:50,990 - Yeah! - Yeah, get a beer. We'll work it out over here. 251 00:13:51,061 --> 00:13:53,086 Well, this is a development I did not expect. 252 00:13:53,163 --> 00:13:55,188 It's like he's really trying to become our father. 253 00:13:55,266 --> 00:13:57,700 - I know how to play football, Charlie. - I know you do, bro. 254 00:13:57,768 --> 00:14:01,295 - I know you do. - Do you want me to leave? 255 00:14:01,372 --> 00:14:05,672 Huh? No, you're good. Just... Actually, make sure you really work that sponge in there. 256 00:14:05,743 --> 00:14:07,836 Because otherwise, that stain, like, it'll... 257 00:14:07,912 --> 00:14:10,642 - It's not gonna get clean if you don't. - Yeah. It's gonna get worse. 258 00:14:10,714 --> 00:14:13,444 - What are we gonna do? We gotta ditch him or something. - Tell you what. 259 00:14:13,517 --> 00:14:16,748 How about you and me, we go out on the town? You know what I mean? 260 00:14:16,820 --> 00:14:20,483 We celebrate this whole... slave situation. 261 00:14:20,557 --> 00:14:23,526 I'd love to, Charlie. I really would. But we don't have any money. 262 00:14:23,594 --> 00:14:26,062 - What are we gonna do? - Oh, I got money. 263 00:14:26,130 --> 00:14:28,724 - What? - Yeah, I got a whole bunch of money, bro. 264 00:14:28,799 --> 00:14:30,824 Frank's been hiding all of his money in my account. 265 00:14:30,901 --> 00:14:34,701 And why was I not made aware of this before? 266 00:14:34,772 --> 00:14:38,105 Uh, it's got something to do with the vig. 267 00:14:38,175 --> 00:14:41,542 - What's a vig? - Well, you know how gangsters, they talk about a vig? 268 00:14:41,612 --> 00:14:44,308 - Yeah? - And it means... 269 00:14:44,381 --> 00:14:46,815 - Yeah. Oh, a vig! - A vig. 270 00:14:46,884 --> 00:14:49,045 - Yeah. Well, you should have a vig. - I should have a vig, right? 271 00:14:49,119 --> 00:14:52,350 - And Frank didn't give me one. - Oh, that's bullshit! You deserve a vig. 272 00:14:52,423 --> 00:14:55,187 - I do. I'm a good guy, right? - You're a great guy. 273 00:14:55,259 --> 00:14:57,318 - I'm a great guy! - We're all great guys who deserve vigs. 274 00:14:57,394 --> 00:14:59,919 - We're good people. - All right, here's the plan. We're gonna slip out of here. 275 00:14:59,997 --> 00:15:02,898 We're gonna hit an A.T.M. We'll take out just a little bit of cash. 276 00:15:02,967 --> 00:15:04,992 - Just a little. - Just enough. He won't even notice it. 277 00:15:05,069 --> 00:15:08,436 Just enough to have a quiet night out. 278 00:15:10,574 --> 00:15:12,940 Here's some for you! Here's some for you! 279 00:15:13,010 --> 00:15:15,001 And here's some for you! 280 00:15:22,853 --> 00:15:24,844 Oh, God. 281 00:15:26,256 --> 00:15:28,247 Oh, shit! 282 00:15:28,325 --> 00:15:30,293 Dennis! 283 00:15:30,361 --> 00:15:33,125 - Dennis! - What happened? 284 00:15:33,197 --> 00:15:36,223 It's 4:00. 285 00:15:37,735 --> 00:15:40,203 I'm freezing and I'm sweating all at once. 286 00:15:40,270 --> 00:15:42,568 I think I may have peed in my pants. 287 00:15:42,639 --> 00:15:44,573 We missed our doctor's appointment. 288 00:15:44,641 --> 00:15:47,735 Well, only by an hour. If we hurry, maybe they'll still see us. 289 00:15:47,811 --> 00:15:52,145 It was yesterday. We missed our appointment by an hour and a day. 290 00:15:52,216 --> 00:15:54,411 We slept through a whole day? 291 00:15:54,485 --> 00:15:58,216 - I feel awful. - I feel like I'm gonna die! 292 00:15:58,288 --> 00:16:01,587 - I don't want to feel like this anymore, Deandra. - Mm-mmm. Me either. 293 00:16:01,658 --> 00:16:05,594 Okay, listen. Maybe if I make a phone call right now... 294 00:16:05,662 --> 00:16:08,256 we'll be able to make another appointment. 295 00:16:08,332 --> 00:16:12,393 - You think he'll see us on such short notice? - We have gotta try. 296 00:16:12,469 --> 00:16:15,961 - Hey, man. Thanks for seeing us on such short notice. - That's what I do, baby. 297 00:16:16,040 --> 00:16:18,031 Two more, please. 298 00:16:21,145 --> 00:16:22,806 - That guy. Yeah. - Yeah. 299 00:16:24,848 --> 00:16:28,249 No, these are old, and I need to get new head shots. 300 00:16:28,318 --> 00:16:30,912 Because you can't have an... an agent without head shots. 301 00:16:30,988 --> 00:16:35,186 Dennis, when you become a veterinarian, will you buy me some new head shots? 302 00:16:35,259 --> 00:16:37,250 Please? Dennis? 303 00:16:37,327 --> 00:16:40,888 - Hey! Dennis! Hey, Dennis. - Wha... What? 304 00:16:40,964 --> 00:16:43,432 When you become a veterinarian, will you buy me head shots, please? 305 00:16:43,500 --> 00:16:46,936 Hey! Hey, get out of here, you piece of shit! 306 00:16:47,004 --> 00:16:49,131 Yeah, I'll buy you stuff. 307 00:16:49,206 --> 00:16:51,572 I'll buy you lots of things. 308 00:16:51,642 --> 00:16:54,634 - I'm definitely gonna buy a bunch of crack. - Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 309 00:17:01,251 --> 00:17:03,412 Hey! Hey, that's Dennis and Dee! 310 00:17:03,487 --> 00:17:05,512 Driver, pull over! 311 00:17:11,462 --> 00:17:14,056 Hey, Dennis! Dee! 312 00:17:15,165 --> 00:17:17,497 - Oh. - Hey. 313 00:17:19,770 --> 00:17:22,136 - Guys. Hey. - Hey. Hey. 314 00:17:22,206 --> 00:17:25,141 - Hey, how's it going? - Good. Real good. 315 00:17:25,209 --> 00:17:28,201 - It's good on our end here. - We're putting a couple things together lately. 316 00:17:28,278 --> 00:17:32,214 - Hey, uh, are you guys holding? - Holding what? 317 00:17:33,617 --> 00:17:36,518 Holding... Do you have any money? 318 00:17:36,587 --> 00:17:38,885 - Please? - Oh, um... 319 00:17:38,956 --> 00:17:41,220 - I just need a little bit of money. Wait! - Charlie, wait! 320 00:17:41,291 --> 00:17:43,418 - Charlie, wait! - No! 321 00:17:43,494 --> 00:17:45,485 Driver, we're done here. 322 00:17:53,437 --> 00:17:55,803 That's enough whining, for crying out loud! 323 00:17:55,873 --> 00:18:00,037 - I think it might be broken. - I told you not to act like such a nancy boy out there. 324 00:18:00,110 --> 00:18:04,547 - Something was bound to happen. - I didn't think it was full contact. 325 00:18:04,615 --> 00:18:07,675 Well, how do you expect to become a better player if nobody pushes you? 326 00:18:07,751 --> 00:18:09,981 Maria, go get us some ice and three beers. 327 00:18:10,053 --> 00:18:12,544 - I don't drink. - Me neither. 328 00:18:12,623 --> 00:18:17,356 You don't drink? Jesus Christ! You two are a couple of downers, huh? 329 00:18:17,427 --> 00:18:21,363 You work hard, you don't drink... How'd you end up on welfare? 330 00:18:21,431 --> 00:18:23,422 Well, it's a vicious cycle, Mr. Frank. 331 00:18:23,500 --> 00:18:26,560 - One cannot support a family on a minimum-wage position. 332 00:18:26,637 --> 00:18:29,333 Oh, shh-shh-shh-shh! 333 00:18:30,874 --> 00:18:33,274 - Y'ello? - This is Pam from First National Bank. 334 00:18:33,343 --> 00:18:36,005 - Charlie Kelly, please. - Yeah, this is Charlie Kelly. 335 00:18:36,079 --> 00:18:39,571 Hi. I'd like to speak with you about some recent activity on your new account. 336 00:18:39,650 --> 00:18:42,619 Some recent activity on my new account? 337 00:18:42,686 --> 00:18:45,086 - We got a big problem here, buddy. - All right. Try it again. 338 00:18:45,155 --> 00:18:47,146 I've tried it three times. It's just not working. 339 00:18:47,224 --> 00:18:50,216 The services have already been rendered. We gotta pay these girls. 340 00:18:50,294 --> 00:18:52,285 - He cut us off. - Is there a problem? 341 00:18:52,362 --> 00:18:54,557 - No. Not a problem here. - No problem. 342 00:18:54,631 --> 00:18:56,758 - I'm calling Hector. - No, no. Don't call Hector. 343 00:18:56,833 --> 00:18:59,199 - I'm calling Wallace. - We shouldn't be calling Hector or Wallace... 344 00:18:59,269 --> 00:19:01,203 - or any other large pimp. - No. 345 00:19:01,271 --> 00:19:04,968 Charlie and I are gonna handle this situation just like we handle every situation. 346 00:19:05,042 --> 00:19:06,976 We are gonna... 347 00:19:10,380 --> 00:19:13,611 Well, you know, we'll just go back to work for a little while. 348 00:19:13,684 --> 00:19:16,710 Just for a little while until we have enough money to buy some more crack. 349 00:19:16,787 --> 00:19:19,187 Then we'll go on welfare, and I'll go be a star. 350 00:19:19,256 --> 00:19:22,089 Then I can be a veterinarian of some kind. 351 00:19:22,159 --> 00:19:24,093 Maybe we should think about rehab. 352 00:19:24,161 --> 00:19:26,186 - We should hit rehab as soon as possible. - Pretty soon. 353 00:19:26,263 --> 00:19:28,197 - In a couple days. - Yeah. 354 00:19:28,265 --> 00:19:30,199 Not now. 355 00:19:30,267 --> 00:19:33,634 - Ahh, Jesus Christ! That was close. - Ohh, look who it is! 356 00:19:33,704 --> 00:19:35,934 What the hell are you guys doing here? 357 00:19:36,006 --> 00:19:37,997 - We're getting our jobs back. - Yeah. 358 00:19:38,075 --> 00:19:41,010 - You can't have em! - We might have a little bit of a drug problem. 359 00:19:41,078 --> 00:19:43,012 - I might not really care. - I don't give a shit. 360 00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:45,173 - Your positions have been filled. - So we're gonna take yours. 361 00:19:45,249 --> 00:19:48,343 - You're not gonna take our jobs. - My dad called and said that we could have your jobs. 362 00:19:48,418 --> 00:19:50,818 We need money to pay our hookers, okay? So you can't have 'em. 363 00:19:50,887 --> 00:19:54,846 - But we need money to buy crack. - Oh, I'm sorry. Did you get addicted to crack? 364 00:19:54,925 --> 00:19:56,916 Did somebody get addicted to crack? 365 00:19:56,994 --> 00:20:00,657 I sweat uncontrollably! 366 00:20:00,731 --> 00:20:03,825 I can't get somebody to have sex with me unless I pay for it! 367 00:20:03,900 --> 00:20:06,460 - Children, children. - ... with me. 368 00:20:06,536 --> 00:20:10,267 - What's all the fighting about? - Did you tell them that they could have our jobs? 369 00:20:10,340 --> 00:20:14,208 Why don't we go on inside where it's nice and warm and we can settle this like a family? 370 00:20:14,278 --> 00:20:16,303 - Come on. - Yeah, what about the slaves? 371 00:20:16,380 --> 00:20:20,180 Slaves are gone. They were bringing me down. Plus, you know they don't drink? 372 00:20:20,250 --> 00:20:22,309 - Drink? I want a drink. - Wait, wait, wait! 373 00:20:22,386 --> 00:20:25,412 - Stop a second. There are gonna be some changes made. - Okay. 374 00:20:25,489 --> 00:20:29,892 All right? First of all, you two from now on are gonna do all of Charlie's work. 375 00:20:29,960 --> 00:20:32,292 - I hate Charlie's work. - No. Not his. 376 00:20:32,362 --> 00:20:36,856 Stop! Charlie, you got a lot of balls stealing my money. 377 00:20:38,302 --> 00:20:41,999 This shows leadership. I am promoting you to management. 378 00:20:42,072 --> 00:20:44,063 - That's why I did it. - That's fantastic! 379 00:20:44,141 --> 00:20:47,201 That's why I did it too. I stole lots of your money. What do I get? 380 00:20:47,277 --> 00:20:51,509 You get dick, because you are a follower and a thief. 381 00:20:51,581 --> 00:20:54,607 But how come Charlie? Not fair. How come Charlie? 382 00:20:54,685 --> 00:20:57,245 Why would you do this to us, Dad? 383 00:20:57,321 --> 00:21:00,722 Because you are crackheads, children. 384 00:21:04,795 --> 00:21:06,854 Yeah. 385 00:21:06,930 --> 00:21:09,626 - Crack. - Crack. 386 00:21:09,700 --> 00:21:12,191 Crack. Crack. 387 00:21:12,269 --> 00:21:14,203 Crack.